Post Comments

Now that's what I call some smart monkeys. Haha. Somehow, I brought this subject up in Chemistry class. I think I can make anything fit into the conversation in there sometimes.

A story borrowed from an amazing Source: Le Profile de BooBoo

newspaper clipping:

Jul 18 2000

A truck driver was attacked Monday morning by a horde of baboons while traveling through a remote area in Saudi Arabia. According to the man, a week earlier he had gone through the same route, and had ran over and killed a baboon. Apparently, the rest of the tribe, infuriated over the death of their comrade, recognized and remembered the red truck that passes the area weekly. The baboons stayed in the area until the next week, when the truck driver again drove through his routine route. According to the man, a baboon shouted a command of attack, and the red truck was suddenly showered with rocks and pebbles of various sizes, thrown by others who had surrounded the area. The driver survived with minor cuts, but the truck is now inoperable. There are about 100,000 baboons in Saudi Arabia.

CosPlay

Yes, I cosplay. Is that bad? I don't know... This year, I have finished a Faye Valentine costume (^^ Waii! She's so kawaii!) and I also have a quasai-ranma suit... I just need to figure out how I'm going to get my hair like her. :T I think I'm going to have to get a wig somehow. EeeSh.. $$!! @_@...

The faye costume is so cute, though!! I have white almost kneehigh boots... They look more like Sailor moon boots than Faye's boots than anything.. But Eh...Close enough! ^_^*.. I'm so excited!! I can't wait for Fanime and SD Comic con!!

Narf. In case you didn't know.. Faye Valentine is the girl on my page... And the costume that I'm talking about is the one in the black and white picture on the left. ^_^*

Teachers Picketing Outside

Ahh, what a refreshing scene in the early morn. During zero period, every teacher without a class was marching around outside with a picket sign, walking up and down, trying to get heard. Yes, this fight that has been going on since the beginning of the year is still not resolved. How annoying. I wish they would just strike already... But that's not going to happen.

Today, they plan on leaving exactly at 2:10. Have you ever seen a teacher leave at the same time as the students? It's going to be hella scary. We got a lot of it on camera. I hope everything just goes back to normal... and soon.

Interesting as this is, I enjoyed school more before all this came about..

Still thinking about the DeGuzeman thing

Last night, I was talking to my friend Allen... And I mentioned Al DeGuzeman to him, and he was like... "Oh yeah! Tell him Allen says WHASSAAP"... "You must have not seen the news" I said... Aish... When he found out how I "knew" Al DeGuzeman, he was so shocked.

Apparently DeGuzeman was really popular in high school... He wasn't even an introverted type... What causes someone to change like that? Or think of something like that... Do they just begin like that inside and have different facades, or does something within them snap... Or what? I guess we'll never know.

Gah. How confusing.

Only You

Oh I.. Need to know
Where we stand
Do we share that special thing called love?
I know I do... What about you?
I need you in my life..
Where do i go?
What do I do?
I can't live without your love
THinking of you, makes me feel
Like I'm the only one for you.

I still can't get it out of my mind

This vision of nick, and coconuts. AHHA

I hate it when

I have to go pee, and I'm sleepy and cold, sitting out here... But I have a really good buttgroove going on, and I don't want to get up. =T.

I associate with these people?

kimtoxication: nick's in a filipino dance
kimtoxication: i wonder if its the one w/ all the lil coconuts
kimtoxication: and they hit themselves
KeyClubbin Hyung: ... You want his coconuts, don't you?!?
kimtoxication: i want them i want them!!
KeyClubbin Hyung: You want his big, fuzzy, round coconuts, don't you!?
kimtoxication: AhAHahaha
kimtoxication: Yeah i do
kimtoxication: ahhaa
KeyClubbin Hyung: You want their... umm... milky juices, don't you!?
KeyClubbin Hyung: Wait, thats gross...
kimtoxication: 0.0
kimtoxication: wow

Nick is in a filipino dance

^_^* What i wouldn't pay to see that! I wonder if he's doing the one with all the little coconuts and they slap themselves. That is the super-cute one.^_^* Hehehe! I love it when the lil filipino boys do that! Or maybe they're doing the stick one where they all run around and hit each other hehe. That's super cuteness.

There was almost another Columbine today

It's so scary to think that I was on that campus just a couple weeks ago. And my friend was taking Astronomy there just last night.

Until now I'd always believed that it was something that could only happen in hick towns... Not where I live, safe, suburban and in between two giant cities. So close... How could anybody be prepared for something like that?

Sigh... I haven't blogged here lately

And the minute I started, it became so addicting. Even more addicting than AIM. Anyhow!! I went to the TET festival today, for the Lunar New Year... It was awesome... I got soo much free stuff!! =D A looot of condoms and lubricant and stuff. HAhahaha but I'm giving those to my brother. :P Happy new year bro! here's some condoms. AHHAA what a present! ^_^* They're Gold Durex kind, too.

I felt really lonely, though... Like... super lonley... I don't know whether it's just because I'm especially emotional right now... (time of month).. or what.. but at one point I was brought to tears... I mean.. My mom left me alone and went off with her friend for a while... So I was just drifting around the fairgrounds alone.. And like... I would stop at the game venders to watch people do things and stuff.. and it was like.. Everyone was in a group... and having fun... I mean... I think I got some inviting looks, from a couple guys... But.. eh...I didn't feel like taking the initiative like I usually do. (Usually when I find myself in that type of situation i'll just introduce myself to someone who looks nice and have fun w/them the whole day).... But I don't know what was different today...

And then.. the game venders kept asking me to try the games... But I didn't really feel like playing.. Just like watching people play. They kept asking me whether or not i had a boyfriend... I think it was because usually the guys play to win things for girls... Aish.. And then some of them even just automatically assumed i have one.. I got a lot of "Go grab your boyfriend over here and get him to win you something!"... That made me feel soooo bad for some reason.. even though I know they didn't mean to hurt my feelings.

Gah... Why am I so insecure? I don't know... But I hate the insecure feeling! It's so.. demeaning. :T Narf.

You met a girl!

Hehehe.. I'm glad!! And then I'm not... :P Cuz what if you stop paying attention to me? I need my attention! hahaha. Just kidding just kidding. :P Even tho, I do miss you! I haven't really had a good talk with you for more than a week. I hope you're doing alright. I really miss yah. I think I'm going to call you as soon as I get offline.

AIM feels strange?!

It's strange, after not going on AIM for so long, I went on for about an hour and it felt like... SOOO LONG.. I thought I had been on for at least 5 hours, but then i checked my status and I had only been on for about an hour and 5 minutes. Eeesh!

Aish... I'm finally back

In case you're wondering where I've been, I've been blogging alternatively at westmontshuttle.org... The shuttle mission is over now, but that was just for the last few days. It's been really tiring

I can't believe tomorrow is monday... But I have a few bits of big news.. 1. I got a car! Finally, my parents bought me a car!... Now.. I just have to learn how to drive. ^_^*

2. Nick might be coming to see me on february 17! :D YAY

Good stuffs. ^_^*

You know what annoys me?

When people have blogs and then abandon them for months and months... And then post like 1 thing 3 months later and expect me to know that they've posted. Sorry to break it to yah, but I stopped checking a month ago. -.- Well, I want to say that anyway... I usually end up saying, "Holdup, lemme check."

But, eh, seeing as I'm on an AIM sabbatical, that hasn't occured in about a week. :)

I never said it was YOU

By the way, happy new year! ^_^; I'm sorry I was so grumpy when you called me. I felt really sick, and you wouldn't answer who you were. :P I'm not very good at recognizing voices.

I talked to Nick on the phone for an hour last night... =D I was just going to call him band wish him a Happy New Year, but I ended up talking to him until almost 12... Like... 20 till or something. ^_^* It was really nice... I forget how soothing his voice is. TeeHee.

He got a tongue ring. I'm not sure if I like that or not yet. Most of the tongue rings I've seen are pretty nasty. But then... Eh... Most that I've seen with tonguerings have been pretty nasty. :T I don't think Nick is nasty to start with (quite the opposite, actually)... so maybe I don't feel that way about his. ^_^* I can't really tell. I'll have to see it in person first.

I should start working on my HW now. ^_^* Muah.

Three days left of my AIM sabbatical

I'm shocked to realise that people actually miss me. ^_^* It actually makes me feel good... Thanks to all of you who have been expressing your concern for the last few days. :P No, I haven't disappeared off the face of the planet. I have night class tonight, and haven't done a whip of homework. Blech. This time around, I have heavy HW, too. -.-

And this time... It's graded. -.-

I think I'm gonna die.

Took Studio Pictures Last Weekend

my singles

^_^*; my doubles w/ my friend Kim. ^_^

my friend kim's single

I feel... Strangely Alone..

I haven't been on AIM for 3 days... I suppose it isn't that surprising that I miss the company of my fellow digital buddies... However, a part of me is simply amazed that I can't even go for a whole day without thinking, "Ooo.. I wonder if so and so is online." The strangest part is -- many of the people I know and talk to all the time, I don't even have their phone number. I don't have their address. Not even their e-mail. How do I bring myself to call somebody my friend -- or even acquaintance, if I don't even know their last name?

And yet I do. I'm shocked at myself. I've lived in a world that is so... Sheltered, and fake... And most of all, 80% imaginary. That's what this is, isn't it? It's like reading a book, you take what you want out of it. Long silences on AIM can mean the person is ignoring you, or for all you know, they're making their dinner. Even I, myself, have been prone to creating rapid B.S. excuses at the appropriate times.

Online, we see what we want to see, and we know others feel the same... So we tell them what they want to hear. I realise that not so deep within my facade of confidence, there lies a lonely girl, who doesn't really believe she will succeed. But my so-called friends don't want to see that. They want to see somebody who is self assured, somebody who knows where they're going. So then I give that to them.

emptiness is loneliness and loneliness is cleanliness and cleanliness is godliness and god is empty. just like me.

smashing pumpkins

My Calc teacher is named Campbell

I live in a town named Campbell. Coincidence? I think not.

Decided to quit AIM for a while

Realised last night that it's ruining my health and my social life. Not to mention, without AIM, I'll have a lot more time for KEY Club, Black Student Union, and the GSA. As of now, I'm doing a half assed job in all three. I feel horrible!! :(

A pinoy named roy, huh? I know a pinoy named roy, too. He lives in San Diego though. He calls me Kimmy. I didn't like that. Only BooBoo gets to call me Kimmy. And only I get to call BooBoo, well, BooBoo. ^_^

My friend Hyung and I came up with a rather good cheer a few months back.. Do you guys know the one ice breaker that goes "Ride ride ride that pony every body get up and ride that big fat pony, ride ride ride that pony, get up and ride that big fat pony!!" ??... Well, just change all the "pony"'s to "pinoy"'s haha. and you'll get our cheer. ^_^; Rather witty, I thought.

It's freezing cold, and my room has a brand-new electric blanket. Isn't it obvious where I'm going to go next? :) Yes yes.

And for those of you who miss me... Call me, please? :) You know I'll be lonley without you. :P Especially Nick.. And Ray... And yeah. Nick and Ray mostly. :D Well, and my asses of course. But that goes without saying. Speaking about my asses. I should get off my ass right now. MuAH.

Good Night, all. :)

Ahh.. How I've Missed You

Lovely blogger page. It's been so long. Yesterday? What happened yesterday that kept me from blogging? Oh yes. I was cleaning out my room. My mom made me pull out my entire wardrobe... And now I have my old wardrobe minus three garbage bags. Heh Heh Heh. Very exciting, isn't it? I found it hard to part with some of the items of clothing.. But I know it's all for the better. Afterall, it ads some umph to the clothes for the clothes drive that I'm running at school.

Ray: (I'm too lazy to link) I've never believed in long distance relationships... It just seems too impossible for me. I dont think I could handle not seeing my significant other at least once a week. Eish. Maybe if I find the right guy. . . Hhaha.

I'm so glad You had fun

Though I'm kinda disappointed that you were drinking. -.-;; Bleeeeeeeeeeeeh. I guess I shouldn't be lecturing you about it, though... I'm not really in a position to be worrying about you. ^.^; Anyhow. I'm going to go look at my new clothes now. Geez. We bought so much I can't even remember what I got!!

I had a Compaq.. too

I feel yah... I only fixed my problem by buying a new computer. Aish!! I'm sooo sorry you have to go through that! I hope everything clears up for you babes. ^_^ Go shirt ninJAY go. HEhehe.

(:P I still say it should be "short ninJAY"...)

Aish

What did i do in my past life to have been born so wretched?

Freedom Train

The day is clear and the sky is sunny. Perfect for the largest rally day of BSU... MLK day. But of course... I have a train ticket. And my mother won't let me go. Five fucking bucks. And it's not the five bucks. It's the fucking principle. I want a car. If I had my own car I wouldn't have had to depend on her. This wouldn't matter. I would be on the train and fucking halfway to San Fransisco for one of the things I'm sure would have been a greatest event of my life.

At one point she even offered to drive me. Right. After she lectured me for almost two hours. Yeah. I'm going to go even though everything I do is going to make me tihnk about her and feel guilty. That's really great. Guilttrip your child into not going. Now she's acting all nice to me too. As if she really cares. She just doesn't want me upset cuz that'll make her life harder. Fuck it. I'm so fucking tired of my politic driven family. Why does everything have to run on so many fucking unsaid rules and laws.

I want to curl up in a little ball and shut the world out.

Sometimes...

Sometimes.. I think that if I could only lay my head on his shoulder and feel him next to me and hold his hand and feel his warmth... all my troubles will disappear and everything will be OK.

I want to know what love is

Sometimes it seems as if human emotions are so elusive to me. There are times when I know I should be filled with indignant anger, or depression, yet I am only filled with apathy. Thare are times that I feel like I'm in a slump, yet everything is fine... and I can't seem to find the happiness that I am reaching for.

And then.. There are days like today, when I reach out and search for love... What is love though... and how will I know waht it is when it comes along? Ah. Everyone tells me I will just know when it happens. What if I'm staring love in the face and I don't know it. What if I've been looking so far for love, and love is right next to me? I have to wonder...

Aish. I'm so emotionally retarded.

Anger and Sadness

I find that whenever I'm angry, sad, or depressed I vent my anger by creating webpages. It's kind of depressing, when I really think about it.. Because I don't really have enough talent to make things extraordinarily good.. So I end up creating a slew of half-assed pages that are alright, but aren't what I would normally churn out during a bout of inspiration.

Im more lonley than anything else today, I guess.

A Relationship on a Lie

Lies. Mm. Especially lies about the superficial. Should they matter? What kind of lie is a bad lie? If I were to tell you that my online persona is completely different than me in real life? What if you found out that I'm not the person that you see?

Would that make things any different between you and I? Would you not love me anymore... Because my exterior is but an illusion?

Why should it matter what I look like on the outside if you truly love me for who I am? Even if I have lied to you from the beginning?

Would things be different if it was a lie about something else?

I find myself at a loss

Have I lost it? Perhaps with Ray gone, I've lost my muse for blogging. Nobody really feels interesting anymore. I still feel a little awkward talking to him now. He told me not to act differently around him... But how can I?. Aish aish. I think I'm going to drown my sorrows away by making a new page layout. :T

^_^ OMG! Katie!! You're Back?!

Suddenly, I went to your page and there were new blogs.. But then.. i have been visiting... And they hadn't showed up before?! Ahh. So confused. Were you unable to publish before? I'm so excited! I'm typing a mile a minute! Puhehehe. :D Ohhh BOY OH BOY. YAY! ^_^ Thankiee for liking my new layout. I haven't talked to you for so long! I LOVE YOU!!

Nick is a moron? Which nick? My Nick? Or some other Nick? Haha. Aish. Did I just say MY Nick? Woo. That sounds bad. I just mean the Nick I know and that you associate with me. Yeah. ^_^*

AHhhh!! Katie's back Katie's back Katie's back!

I was going to call you this weekend, if you didn't come on. I was getting really worried!!

MUAH. I love you sweet thang!

Do you lose on purpose sometimes?

Sometimes I wonder, because our stakes are so even. Heh. But then, you have to wear my underwear on your head. I don't think anybody in their right mind would lose a bet like that on purpose. Hm... My fate, however, I think is far worse than yours. *Shakes head*. I haven't mooned somebody in a whole year! If I start it up again now, what if I never stop?

Interesting thought..

Auto response from lytePinoy (10:00:28 PM): After reading a very inspiring yet depressing essay about the squandering youth and finance of American Kids by going to college. I've decided to attempt to gaze upon school in a different light... So i'm actually gonna try to like the homework i'm doing. Because its soooo educational. Why i'm saying all this i do not kno.. and why i'm actually gonna post this i deffinetely dont dont kno... N E WAYZ leave a message

That really does make you wonder, doesn't it? Is college really a waste of time? I can't really tell. I suppose that's one of the things we're all most afraid of. What if everything we do is just a waste of time? I mean, what are we, as individuals, seeking to achieve in our short life span? What CAN we achieve? I aspire to make a difference in the world, but can I really? And what of others... Those who do not really have a dream? What method of justification do they use to exist?

I do not know. I'm going off on a tangent here, like usual. Back to the topic of college squandering youth. It all depends on the individual, I suppose. For some, college is right, for others it isn't. If it's not right for you and you go, you're screwed. If it is right for you and you don't go, you're screwed. If you match up correctly, but then mess up, you're screwed. So the way I figure it, unless you know yourself very well, it's a lot like gambling with your life.

Aish. Aren't I rather morbidish today. I don't know. I suppose I feel a little on the disillusioned side at the moment. The strange thing is, I really don't know why. Heh. Perhaps it is I who should be trying to know myself more. Mm. Do as I preach? Fat chance. We all know I'm a perverse creature by nature. Heh.

I'm Sorry

You always make fun of me for apologizing too much... But how can I not say sorry when I've made you cry?. You're one of my closest friends right now, maybe not as close as BooBoo, perhaps.. But you're high on my priorities list. I never meant to hurt you. I didn't even know. And yet I'm sorry... I'm sorry because I am who I am, I suppose... and I can't really help it.

I apologize too much, I suppose, and that makes it meaningless to you. At least it still means something to me.

You are SO obvious. -.-

We all know that there's only one person who forces other people to pay homage... and that person is ME! Geesh. Hahaha. I can't wait until I take over the whole world, and my homage will be paid. Hahaha.. Mike says that when I'm done taking my homage I'll be sore. ^^* Well, I'm only going to take homage from the very select few, so... Don't you worry, Mike! ^_^ Hahaha.. Well, maybe a select ONE. :P I wonder if he knows who he is? Haha. Probably not. He can be a dork like that. Mph.

Perphect.

Go After Him

Go after him go after him they always say. Don't wait for the what ifs. Don't wait too long. What if he finds a girl? Don't give me the crap about it not being meant to be. Person after person has said this to me. Sometimes I even wonder if the decisions I've made are wrong. Sometimes I wonder if I should say something directly.

But then I realise that I shouldn't have to. It's not as if I'm not bold around him -- it's just that I haven't addressed the subject directly. I suppose there are many what ifs... But I value him so much that I fear making things awkward. I know I've put my foot in my mouth, and wanted to kick myself for it.

I don't even think that I'm right for relationships. Why do I let myself feel pressured to be put into that group of girls that always needs to have a boyfriend? Ah, what saddens me the most is that I appear so needy that I must have him or else I'll die or soemthing like that. Aish. I'm going to bed.

"DonG"

You were listening to me that night? Strange. The thought comforts me, yet scares me a little. People don't normally take much heed into the thngs I say, I suppose. ^_^ That's why I'm not used to it. Teehee.

Ahhh... Quake III Party @ School Today

I had forgotten how wonderful it feels to blow someone to bits with a rocket launcher. Every time I play quake I want to see Nate and Ashish and Mike again, though. That was probably one of the best times I had my life... This summer that is... When I worked for Actuate, we would spend our lunchbreaks playing Quake 3 Arena... I really really sucked, but I had a great time. ^_^ Once, I got 23 frags in a 75 frag game! Go me. Hahaha.

I guess I can never bring that exact same feeling back, no matter how much I want to emulate it. Oh well, at least I'm having other types of good times associated with the game. ^_^ It's nice... One of the only times that I've been able to really connect with some people at school. :)

Suddenly I'm brought back to the time when I first met Mike, and he showed me how to use the mouse to navigate on quake. Ahh. And then he asked me for my e-mail... And everything went from there. At the time I had also just started talking to Nick all night. ^_^ It was nice. I remember that. Summer. Full of happy things, warmth and stuff. Now that I think about it, pretty much everything that has had a lot of impact on me this year has had to do with what I did this summer. Ahhhh. Interesting.

Anyhow. We're about to go home now. Good stuff. ^_^

I don't know, was I?

You ask a hard question. ^_^ I can't tell. If it had happened it would have happened, right? I don't know. Since it didn't happen, I guess it wasn't supposed to, or something. I feel strangely guilty anyway. Especially towards your feelings. I'm wretched, so I guess I really don't feel anything. :T Hm.

"Oh, So you live in California...

Do you know so and so?"... Do I know who? Out of millions and millions of people. Do I know one insignificant person that you happen to know that lives somewhere in California? NO! I don't think so. Damn you people from other states. It's not like I'm from a state with one freakin' electoral vote aiite.

What is RIGHT?

Everybody believes they are right. But to somebody else they may be wrong. What then, is right? What then, is wrong? In some remote society, one may be taught that yams are more precious than gold... But in our society gold is everything and yams are nothing. Can we automatically assume that they are wrong, simply because what they believe is different than something that we commonly accept as right?

But then, as humans, what makes us want to change others to our method of thought? Do we really need that kind of collaboration to survive? It perturbs me that what is right to me is not right to others. The idea is not strange. It's just that my puny human brain can't seem to grasp that concept very well. Aish.

I have many ant carcasses on my table right now.

Connotations of Love

There's friend love and then there's looove love. Oftentimes we as teenagers seem to forget that there's a difference between the two. Some take the word very seriously, and others use the word lightly. I use the word for friendship, but never in a romantic manner. I fear the romantic connotations, but I feel that telling someone I "like" them has more romantic connotations than the former.

For the two different types to understand each other, there needs to be a spoken understanding, I think... It's like when two people look at a cloud and see different shapes. The two look at the word love and see it in a different way. However, that doesn't mean that the cloud is not there; and it doesn't mean that the love doesn't exist. Only that the first person does not preceive love in the same way as the second does.

Yoyo ma VS. Yo mama

Auto response from r mademan Z 6iB (7:51:58 PM): yo yo ma
im VERY ticKLish (8:13:51 PM): i think you meant
im VERY ticKLish (8:13:54 PM): "yo ma ma"
r mademan Z 6iB (8:16:04 PM): noooh
r mademan Z 6iB (8:16:06 PM): yoyoma
r mademan Z 6iB (8:16:07 PM): yoyo ma
r mademan Z 6iB (8:16:12 PM): famous chinese celloist
im VERY ticKLish (8:16:21 PM): heh
im VERY ticKLish (8:16:30 PM): "yo ma ma" famous ebonics phrase
r mademan Z 6iB (8:16:33 PM): you knew that right?
r mademan Z 6iB (8:16:43 PM): heh
im VERY ticKLish (8:16:49 PM): i'm sorry ray
r mademan Z 6iB (8:16:52 PM): i think i'd know when i wanna say "yo ma ma"
im VERY ticKLish (8:16:52 PM): we're fromd iffernt worlds
r mademan Z 6iB (8:16:53 PM): hahaha
im VERY ticKLish (8:16:53 PM): hahaha
r mademan Z 6iB (8:17:04 PM): yo mama
r mademan Z 6iB (8:17:08 PM): hit me up wit some of dat bootay
im VERY ticKLish (8:17:29 PM): ahh... it's like a sea of culture separates us
im VERY ticKLish (8:17:40 PM): You're from the affluent side
im VERY ticKLish (8:17:46 PM): and I'm from the westside
im VERY ticKLish (8:17:49 PM): It won't work

I'm a Big Fan of GAMING Techno

It's weird, but I think techno songs with a backdrop of familiar midi-ish music of old games are awesome. Not only are they fun to dance to if they're done well (Like pretending you're a tetris piece in the tetris techno), it's a nice reminiscing piece. Like when I play the FF7 techno and everyone is all, "AWWwWw!!! I REMEMBER THAT GAME!". Heh..

I found a really awesome site for downloading such songs today. It's called the Overclocked ReMix Page. Basically it's hella remixes of different games. Man, I love this site. ^_^ I think I'm going to put it permanantly on my 'bookmarked' section. Teehee.

Thinking of adding new sections to the thing on the right... But I don't know.. Is there already too much info about me already? Heh. Ehhh.. Who cares, right. Yeah. Haha. I'll do it if I have spare time i guess. (Erp.)

Ahh.. Young Love

I find myself so envious of my friends. I watch them loving each other, and being happy together... And I'm happy for them... But at the same time, I'm extremely envious. It's so strange, too.. Because now a days, people being together for 6 months or more doesn't seem long at all... The time has been flying by so fast lately.

When I was in middle school, I always imagined that I would have a high school sweetheart. Now, here I am, a senior... And yet, I still can't truthfully say that I've actually loved yet. I want to know what love feels like. How do I know? Everybody tells me I'll just feel it.. And I'll just know... Somehow I doubt that.

What if I'm incapable of love? What if I'm like.. some freak accident, and I'm a mutant and I'm going to be picked up by the X-MEn for someting hecka crazy or something? My imagination is running away with me again. AND I'm in one of those incoherant modes. That's wonderful! Hah. Roite.

Ahh. Everyone seems to have found "the one" in high school for them. Whether the outcome has been good or bad, they have found "the one". I want to find "the one", goddamnit. I don't want to waste this last year. I want to experience what everybody else has experience. Damnit. I want to be a conformist. I want to be like everybody else.

Ahh.. Finally Home

I noticed a certain trend in my last few day's posts -- Rather depressing. I know that it's never fun to go to someone's blog and see all that they can think about to write about are complaints about themselves and the things around them, so I'm going to make an effort to make this a little lighter. ^_^*

Ahhh... Reminiscing

A couple of friends an I spent the afternoon at a sandwich place, just talking about all the things we used to do... Like bubble bobble... and archanoid and stuff. It was fun. ^_^ We talked about all the good things that have happened this year for once. That put me in a rather good mood. I feel a lot more appreciative of everything now. :)

"Depressing" Songs

Misery must really love company, because I notice that when I feel like crap... I love listening to songs about other people that feel like crap. Ahh, the human psyche. A horrible and chaotic little thing. I hate it. I love it? It is me, I suppose. Nothing I can really do. =T

Idiotic

I often find myself angry at myself for caring. Why should I care, when it doesn't really benefit me? I get angry at myself because he isn't really that special, or has any special trait that makes him different from the world... yet to me, he could be the world. I find myself angry because it's something I can't reason, something I can't put my fingers on. I would try to draw it, or recreate it visually, but i would just cheapen the image. It pisses me off. Argh. I think Im just in that time of month where I don't like anybody. Hah. Argh.

I'm Scared!

Thunder and lighting, and I'm practically outside. It's horrifying!! I'm scared. I see the lightening, and I just cringe, and wait for the thunder to reply. It's so loud right now that it shakes my computer table. The room I'm in right now has a metal roof. That's always kind of scary. Aiee. Is this the end of me? Am I dying tonight? Hah. Fat chance.

RAINY DAY and DAY: Dragon Ash

It feels good to have this blasting. RAINY DAY AND DAY. WHY DONT YOU GO CRY M**FKER!! RAINY DAY AND DAY! AINT NOTHIN GONNA GO MY WAY!

Rain Rain, Go Away, Come Again Another Day

When the rain comes down, all I want to do is dream. Dream dreams that are sweet. Dreams that drown out the sound of rain. I really am dysfunctional. Some people hate the sun. I hate the anger that rain fills me with. I hate the cold. Rain really is like crying... Your body shakes, you feel cold and alone, and your face gets wet. Splatter. Splatter. Splatter.

I've never cried so that it splattered. Like in movies, when people cry, and they show the teardrops hitting the windowsill or whatever. That never happens to me. Oh wait... It did happen when I was writing in my journal, oh so long ago. Yes. That was rather tearstained. Ahh. How touching. Young torment. Wretched, I think, is the right word for me.

Melancholy

The rain fills me with melancholy. The sky raining outside reminds me of tears... A thousand angels crying. I wonder why they are crying? Perhaps they are disappointed in me. Of course, it has to be about me. I am the center of my universe. Perhaps they know I am crying inside, and they want me to know that they feel my pain. The sky is crying outside, I am crying inside... Yet the tears don't come to my eyes. I almost want them to. Sigh.

I Want to have Sex

I suddenly have a strong urge to know how it feels. It seems as if none of my closest friends right now are virgins. I mean, I meet a lot of people who haven't even kissed yet... But then, most of the people I talk to, it seems as if they already have. Maybe more people lie about their innocence than I think. I know I lie about my innocence sometimes er... or should I say, my lack of?. ^_^*

I haven't had sex though... it fills me with curiosity. I know it's going to hurt. I wonder if it will hurt for very long. I almost hope the man I'm with doesn't have a very large penis... I don't know if I could handle a very big one. ^_^* Teehee. Darn, no more going after black guys, I suppose.

I'm feeling rather perverted tonight, heh. I wonder how large Nick's penis is? Are all penises the same? Would I be turned off if I saw one that was smaller than 5 inches. Hm. Haha.. I really don't know. ^_^; I kinda want to just study one tho. That'd be cool.

Fresh Choice Night

Fresh Choice Night, huh. It was actually more eventful than I had wanted it to be. I thought it would just be an excursion to Fresh Choice where I met up with a few friends and made points for CSF. No such luck. ^_^; I invited the "infamous" Mike, which made my mother decide to go, and made my mother force me to dress in nice clothes (I was planning on going in sweats.. HA!)... Yeah..

It was definitely nice seeing Mike again -- I hadn't seen him since October. Wow! At least we've been keeping phone contact... But yeah, I guess since seeing Mike wasn't as difficult as seeing Nick, the waiting period didn't seem as long to me. It was nice to have somebody to talk about everything to again. I think it's really rare to be able to find someone to just talk about random stuff to, and somebody with just a different view of life than everybody else. One of the most refreshing things about Mike is that his way of looking at things is just so different that it makes me pause, and think a little. Thinking is definitely good.

I want to see Nick again

I guess since he's back in college, no such luck here. He's going to be on less and less. I'll resort to calling him once a week again. Heh. ^_^* I feel very proud of him always though... So I guess it's no biggie. Aish... I just miss talking to him so much sometimes. :P

Ahh.. Why am I writing here instead of analyzing poetry! Goddamn this blogger addiction! It's gotten worse since blogger got better! BOOO

You Stole my Freckle Ink!

Last night, as I was lying in bed, a memory came back to me... Maybe it was my deleriousness, or maybe I was just half dreaming... But I was distinctly reminded of sitting in Hooters with Nick and noticing that he had a freckle in the same spot on his left palm as I do in my right palm. :P He accused me of stealing his freckle, because he had it first... Hah! What a butt... We both knew that *I* had it first. :P Mine was just smaller cuz my hand is smaller. Hmm. I still say that HE stole my freckle and that's why mine has been getting less dark as time goes on... -.- HE claimed mine wasn't permanant because I stole his ink. HmPH. roite. I still think mine is more probable.

Ahhhh... How refreshing! Blogger is BACK!

Thank you thank you thank YOU to all those people who contributed to the blogger server fund. :*) I really wanted to contribute as well, but then I remembered that a) I'm a dirt-poor high school student at the moment and b) I don't have a credit card. BOO. Oh well, though. ^___^ YAY blogger.com!! I love them.

I'm at home today

Due to illness.. Gross. I should be doing some homework, I know... But blogger is just too tempting! I've been going for too long without being able to blog at anytime of day I want... Plus, I was gone for the weekend, so that didn't help my blogger addiction. :P I remember trying to jot things down to remember to blog.. But now I've forgotten.

Having Trouble Typing

This morning in a frenzied attempt to cut out some shoulder pads from my red VASH: The Stampede jacket, I succeeded in chopping into the skin on the inside joint of my middle finger on my left hand. A nice, 1/8th an inch deep wound. A 1/8th an inch wound that filled a substantial part of my cupped, very painful hand in blood. It was great.

The bleeding has stopped, which is great, but the wound opens up every time my middle finger comes close to being straight. For some reason the muscle from my wrist to my middle finger is screaming with pain every time i move it. I don't think i hurt nay muscles or anything.. ALthough a good portion of feeling has left my middle finger... heh.

Catching Up...

Haven't been able to connect to blogger for a long time. Last weekend I went on another board meeting for KEY Club... Wow.. It's been a long time since i've felt secure about what KEY club is really there for. Finally seeing everyong again, and realizing that we're all working towards the same general goal makes me feel really happy.

I'm dead tired, though. It never feels like I get enough sleep at these things, and when I get home it always seems as if I have so much ... stuff... to do. I hate that. I think everybody feels that way, though... I mean, we're all pretty busy I guess. ^^; I heard I missed an "online party" last night with the board though.. Heh, darn. I was voted on the standouts as "Online the MOST" too. ^_~

Ah. Nick is distracting

I was finishing something up and, of course, Nick signed on. I love how I want to stop working on everything while I talk to him. hah. It's great. He always has such interesting things to say, though... and I really can't imagine NOT wanting to talk to him. :P He's still such a mystery to me... A good kind of mystery, though.

Fickle? Or just Human?

Sometimes, when I think about him I really don't know how I can feel so strongly about one human being... And then at other times... I despise him with all my heart. Haha.. I despise him because I'm so infatuated I suppose, and I can't understand that. It's like when you have a bad habit... and you wonder why it feels so good doing whatever it is you do... but at the same time you hate yourself, because you know it's not doing you any good.

What have I accomplished in liking him? Absolutely nothing. If anything, I've been hindering myself and him because of my foolish adolescentesque troubles. I've gone backwards in my quest for maturity, and have ended back in fifth through seventh grade when I liked Martin Sobotkiewicz and couldn't tell him... Hah. And then there was Travis Gonzolas... I guess, since then I've promised myself never to be secretive about my feelings.

It's not like I'm being very secretive anyway... I'm pretty obvious about the way I feel. But why why why... Why can't I just tell him straight out? It weighs upon me heavily that I haven't the courage to just admit to him that I have feelings for him. I think I said something about it once or twice... But it didn't come out the way I wanted it to.

Then... Why tell him in the first place? Telling him would be a sort of ultimatum, right? I mean, he would be forced into telling me how he felt about me... I don't really want to hear the truth -- because I do know the truth... But I'd still like to think that I have a chance. Haha... I love the way I willingly blind myself. I suppose knowing for sure would bring a nice feeling of finality.

But I don't really want finality. What is it that I want then? I ask myself that very question every day. You know.. I don't think I would be feeling this way, though, if all my friends who suddenly have significant others didn't start trying to push me towards the "get with somebody or you'll be a lonley old maid" ideology. I swear, that's what it feels like. "Why don't you get with so and so? It feels so good to be with someone... Don't wait too long.. blahblah" on and on...

I always thought that you couldn't wiat too long... I mean... If the person goes away, that just means it wasn't meant to be, right? I mean... I can't imagine myself rushing into a relationship anymore... It'd be too traumatic... Plus.. Who wants to be tied down to somebody they barely know?

One of my friends recently went into a relationship where he only knew the girl for a couple of weeks... and only online. They met, and immediatel started to go steady afterwards. And then, when I commented on it, he said that he felt for her as much as I felt towards the one I like. That irked me at the time because I knew he had never met her and only knew her online... But even more when I found out that he had only known her for a couple weeks.

Well, now those two are having problems. She's his first girlfriend, and he's being torn ten different ways it seems... adn it's only been five days since they started going out. This is one of the people who is encouraging me to get into a relationship. I don't understand people like that. Misery likes company, I suppose. (Even though he ademantly will deny he's in any misery)...

Hah.. two days ago, he even asked me why I liked the on I liked.... I didn't even start to tell him when he said "Wow, that's a lot of things..."... But what can I say? He's able to go steady with a girl he's only known for two weeks. I think it's a relationship of desparation though... he's not very attractive, and I don't know about her.. but from what he has told me it sounds like she's rather... easy.

Aish. This is getting too long. I guess after finishing that 15 page report, I just got used to typing away. ^_^* Aiiet. Leyts

"How to be a PIMP

Ahhh... Fond memories... ^_^; I remember when Carolyn and I made up this list. We had both broken up with our boyfriends fairly recently... I never HAVE found a guy that fits all the requirements... But I know now that I can't really find the perfect guy by marking all the little boxes on a checklist. Aish. I guess I've learned that the hard way.... So many times I've been yelled at. =X erp.

What IS the perfect guy, though? Is there one? I suppose not... But then, a puzzle piece is not a perfect shape.. Yet it can fit with another puzzle piece perfectly, right?... I guess I just have to find a guy with the right amount of bumps and grooves. ^_^* And try not to force two pieces together that don't really fit. Heh.

Yanno... I am the queen of stupid Analogies.

It's so strange... But I always try to explain myself by using analogies... Sometimes they work and sometimes they don't. ^_^* Some are just plain strange... Haha.... You know, maybe I should start an archive of all my analogies. That'd be hella funny. HMM! An idea. :D

Boy is Blogger Clogged

Thanks to all of the hype in the media, it seems as if my dear blogger.com has slowed down to a snail's crawl. Hell, I can't even sign on when I want to... Well, that is, unless it's at 1AM in the morning, and everybody's in bed. ^_^*. Even then, aish.

Not like I have much to say anyway

I had the strangest incident today. I came home from school dead tired from working on my paper, so I took a nap, right? Normal enough... The strange part, is that when I woke up at 5:00pm, I was completely naked! I don't remember taking off my clothes at all... When I woke up a thousand different questions went through my mind. (Ha!)... And yet.. I STILL don't know what's going on... o_O Maybe I had a wild dream or something... Hmmm.

Yeah, I'm writing a lot in fear of disconnection

My friend just told me that he might be studying abroad for a year. Wow. Abroad. I could never imagine studying in another country. I barely speak ENGLISH well enough as it is. "Am I Hot Or Not"

I just found out a rather interesting tidbit... The creators of "AmIHotOrNot.com are from Mountain View... (Or at least so says Wired) Who knew that the Silicon Valley could spawn so much genius? ^_^; Hmmm.. I wonder what MY big break will be. :D We'll see, we'll see.

I guess I'm outtie.

I'll be gone this weekend. ^_^ Will you miss me? I hope so... I was really excited today to look at my counter stats and find out that I had 73 whole hits yesterday and as of now about 47 hits for today! Wow.. I guess I really do have some readers. ^_^* I have to thank you... Because well, yanno.. If nobody read this... I'd probably be a lot more bored with my site. :) Teehee...

This makes a good conversation piece... Though it HAS gotten me into trouble before. =X me and my big mouth yeah... ^_^ It's OK though I suppose.. It's a way of getting stuff off my chest without actually telling people. ^_^* Eesh.. I guess if people really want to know what I think about them they can go here... And if they don't... Welps... :D They don't, then.. rai? :D

Yeah... Okay. really gonna go now. MUAHZ

Lack of Blogness

I didn't blog today.. Bah.. Stupid 200 point English work. I hate doing work. I really do. ^_^ It's all good though.. I incorporated a lot of procrastination... I did some things that I've been planning to do for a while n w. BWAHAHahHAha.

-Kim

UNV- So In Love With You
I want this for my wedding day. haha

You are to me what poetry tries to say with the word
You are the song all music my heart ever heard
I cant escape the air that I breathe even speaks of you
And I'm not ashamed to say that I feel this way

I will stand before god
Give you all that I've got
I can promise you I'll be true
I'll review here and now
As we both take this vow
I am so in love with you

Words can't express what I confess
With each beat of my heart I'm overwhelmed
With the passion I felt from the start

Our love will grow As the years come and go
I'll remain by your side Oh yes I will
There isn't anything that I would deny

I promise to honor and cherish you
For better or for worse
I'll be there for you
For richer or for poorer
And in sickness and in health
'Till death do us part

Oh and I will

From this day on and forever

I am so in love with you

So this guy Napster-Messages me and askes me "WHY THE #(*$ YOU DISCONNECT ME?!"

Right?.. so then.. After I explained that I was connected on a 56 K modem and am connected at 28.8 speed... This was the reply..

KOREAN-4> I don't give a flying @^^^ about how stupid and how ^#&$ed up your computer is but answer the %@%&in question
a-very-cute-girl> Haha
a-very-cute-girl> DUH
a-very-cute-girl> shouldn't that answer your question?
KOREAN-4> ya LOL
a-very-cute-girl> At why I disconnect you?
a-very-cute-girl> I WAS answering your question
KOREAN-4> $!!^ u
a-very-cute-girl> If you really want to
KOREAN-4> u an't Korean so #%#$ off
a-very-cute-girl> You're the one who's trying to download from me
a-very-cute-girl> I don't need anything from you ahhaha
a-very-cute-girl> :P
a-very-cute-girl> I was just explaining
KOREAN-4> ya y u got a problem
a-very-cute-girl> - Something I didn't even need to do
a-very-cute-girl> I don't have a problem
KOREAN-4> yo mama
a-very-cute-girl> I was just being nice
a-very-cute-girl> Ohhh I'm shocked
KOREAN-4> yo mama
a-very-cute-girl> Your intelligence is only surpassed by your incredible vocabulary
KOREAN-4> tell your mama that I had good time w/her lastnight ok biaaaaatch
KOREAN-4> what
a-very-cute-girl> My mother, for your information, is 51 years old
KOREAN-4> Korean Mafia &#&#$ what wuss-up u ripped ##^#
a-very-cute-girl> I highly doubt you would have wanted to be with her
a-very-cute-girl> Say
a-very-cute-girl> My friend's dad is in the Korean mafia
a-very-cute-girl> She was telling me about it
KOREAN-4> I don't give a %&$%
a-very-cute-girl> Do you know anybody by the last name of Song?
a-very-cute-girl> Oh
a-very-cute-girl> i thought you were telling me you were part of the Korean Mafia
a-very-cute-girl> :Shrug:
KOREAN-4> My point is u an't ^@$!in Korean so stop downloading Korean song u stupid #@$ %!#&&
a-very-cute-girl> ?
a-very-cute-girl> Actually
a-very-cute-girl> I didn't download them in the first place
a-very-cute-girl> I bought the CD's
a-very-cute-girl> You should be grateful
KOREAN-4> u heard me
a-very-cute-girl> I'm helping out your country's economy
a-very-cute-girl> Plus
a-very-cute-girl> You're the one currently downloading from me, are you not?
KOREAN-4> I don't give a $!$$ dumb !$$%
a-very-cute-girl> aren't you ashamed that you're ripping off your own people?
KOREAN-4> + you &&$$ed your dad ya
a-very-cute-girl> I'm shocked that such a nationalistic person like you
a-very-cute-girl> Wouldn't support your own country in every way.
a-very-cute-girl> Actually
a-very-cute-girl> I haven't seen my dad for 8 years.
a-very-cute-girl> He died
a-very-cute-girl> So I wouldn't know if I ever had
KOREAN-4> i hear your dad calling you so go ask him what he wants he might ask u to !%&^ so go hurry up
a-very-cute-girl> You know
a-very-cute-girl> You really shouldn't talk about dead people that way
a-very-cute-girl> It might catch up to you.
a-very-cute-girl> Oh yeah
KOREAN-4> &&&# u yo mama thats what &^&^!
a-very-cute-girl> I hope you don't mind
a-very-cute-girl> But this conversation
a-very-cute-girl> Will be posted on the internet
KOREAN-4> ya ya yo mama
a-very-cute-girl> =] It's just too funny
a-very-cute-girl> If you want to see it, in about an hour it'll be at
a-very-cute-girl> www.madpimp.com/blog/
KOREAN-4> ok thats find w/ me #@%@!
a-very-cute-girl> ^_^
KOREAN-4> good job thanks now I'm famous ha !@@@ u yo mama
a-very-cute-girl> Hey
a-very-cute-girl> Awesome
a-very-cute-girl> I'm famous too, right?
a-very-cute-girl> If my site makes you famous
a-very-cute-girl> That must mean I'm SUPER famous a-very-cute-girl> ^_^
a-very-cute-girl> That's tight
a-very-cute-girl> I never thought I would be famous before

Okay.. so It's mean to pick on dumb people... Bah humbug. hehe

Jonny Ngo Said...

"as you can see, there are no pictures here. how can images truly express how i feel. can a picture show the warm fuzzy feeling whenever i'm near her? can the lines on this screen show you how i melt when i hold her. can anything really capture the smile on my face when she tickles me, when we get her favorite orange flavor popsicle, or when i light up at everything that reminds me of her? can a picture really tell you how much i love her?"

Well, buddy, I think you've expressed very eloquently in so many words. That really touched me, though. I don't know why... True love.. Aish. I'm so envious of you Jonny... I am I am.

On Friendship

I decided today that I would try to make up with an old friend of mine. I bought her something over break, completely forgetting that we weren't really talking anymore. But today, I looked at the comic and I thought, "Maybe it was meant to be... Maybe I bought those so that I could try one more time to be her friend."

Maybe I'm being too melodramatic.

Friendship is a strange thing to me. I really don't know what it means to be friends with somebody I guess. I try, though... I guess I'm just a social idiot in a way. ^_^; It's difficult for me sometimes... But maybe... Since I know I still have a lot to learn about friendship... I'll learn from my mistakes and make good friends along the way.

If there were one person I could say that has taught me the most about friendship... I think it would have to be BooBoo, my bro. He's been so caring and understanding through everything.

asnoutkazt (12:33:20 PM): happy nude year!

Hah. Happy nude year, he says. I'd love to see you nude, Steven. :P Oh wait. I already have BWHAHAHAHA!! :runs away, photos in hand:

Who Did YOU Kiss Last Night?

I find everyone asking me that question. Haha. Some even saying "Did you have fun with Nick last night?" Uhh.. Hello... I guess people don't listen to me when I tell them he lives in SoCal. That's so annoying.

Nowadays, because of the new online world and all, people don't really communicate as much as they used to. I find that most people forget the things I've talked about, and occasionally, I even forget things about them (Though, that seems to happen a bit less...)

This human tendency to forget what others are saying if it doesn't have a direct affect on the listener/reader has been heightened by online communication. It's so easy just to type "Ahh.. Uh-huh.. Wow... Nuh-uh... Teehee... Haha... Really?!." and my all time favourite, and universal answer "^_^*", and wait until the IM signals again.

I suppose it's not completely bad. I mean, on one hand, the party that is speaking gets to unload what they want, to a seemingly intent listener.. and on the other hand, the person listening does not have to listen as intently as they appear to be -- giving the listener some relief and the ability to do other things whilst trying to solve the former's problems.

And so, as I go on to answer the idle questionings of the countless people IMing me... I have to wonder... How many times will the same person ask me the same question before they remember. . .

The Typical Teen Domain

I remember the time when I wanted to be the typical teen domain. I wonder if I still am. The typical teen domain has information about its author, hosts, rags on other domains for copying their ideas, and most of them focus on design, and have no real purpose at all. Haha. Hey, I fulfill 4/5 of those... I guess I AM a typical teen domain. But then... What can I do to make things different? I suppose I could find something to say. Or I could try to make myself stand out in one way or another...

But then... What good would that do? Am I really doing this for the noteriety? What AM I doing this for, if not that? Perhaps I'm just doing this for self-fulfillment... I DO find something in creating pages that most don't seem to... I'm not sure... Haha. I find myself questioning a lot of things lately. Maybe after finding some answers, I'll be a little less strange...

Teen hacker to do time

Haha I remember running into this a couple months ago and being AMAZED at how.. competent.. our defense system is.

The U.S. Department of Justice last week announced the first instance of a convicted juvenile hacker having to serve time for acts of juvenile delinquency. The 16-year-old Miami resident pleaded guilty to hacking crimes and is to serve six months in a detention facility. Going by the name "cOmrade" on the Internet, the young man owned up to a number of computer intrusions dating from Aug. 23, 1999 to Oct. 27, 1999. He made his way into a military computer network used by the U.S. Defense Threat Reduction Agency. He also gained unauthorized access to a server located in Dulles, Va., and installed back-door access to the server, according to a Justice Department statement. The Miami hacker, whose name was not released, also accessed 13 NASA computers located at the Marshall Space Flight Center in Huntsville, Ala. He retrieved and downloaded proprietary software from NASA worth around $1.7 million.
http://www.nwfusion.com/archive/2000/107931_09-25-2000.html?nf

A Most Insightful Page

despair.com has so many interesting little tidbits, it even encourages ME to buy a calender from them. Arg. Too bad I dont have any credit card. :cries:

On Drinking

Most of my friends drink -- or at least have been drunk before. Me? I'm a drinking virgin. At times I wonder if I should try drinking - I mean, people look like they're having so much fun.. right? So what stops me?

The taste of alcohol doesn't appeal to me much. ^_^ Just because I've never been drunk doesn't mean I've never tasted any. Its flavour distinctly reminds me of the smell of burnt rubber and the products we used to use at my mom's nail care salon.

And as for the effects... First of all, I'm not quite sure the effects are worth the bitter taste... Plus... What are the effects, really? You lose a little control over your body... Your inhibitations are gone... I wonder why it's so pleasurable to humans to have so little control...

Yet, alcohol and narcotics have been a part of almost every culture for thousands of years... Probably since time began... When the first man ate a mushroom that made him say "Whoa..."... So it must, to a certain extent, have some merit... Or else we would have not kept these as part of our society, right?

But then, there are laws against people my age drinking. There must be a reason for that. I mean, why would the law prohibit something if it was simply a part of the culture? I suppose you could look at it in the same way as porn is outlawed in Japan --there's still a lot of it, and it's still a part of the culture, they just have to be more discreet about it... However, in America things are a bit looser than that, right? So why not legalize alcohol to children at a younger age, like in most countries?

With all this in mind, though, and looking forward to the freedom of college in less than a year... I don't think I'll start drinking anytime soon. Maybe I'm wrong. ^_^* Maybe I'll be eating my words next year... Hah. I really don't know. I guess we'll just have to see what happens.

Haha.. I got a message from Nick at 1:40AM wishing me a "Happy Merry New Year". Happy Merry New Year to you too. ^_^; He sounded kinda strange though... Haha.. Maybe he was drunk. :P Silly boy.

I'm a walking anime! Maybe I'll draw a comic about myself sometime. ^_^

Ray: ^_^ I feel selfish... But... I'm glad you didn't go tonight. Haha.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

And many thanks to Ray and BooBoo, who made this New Year 100x better than it could have been w/out them.

Everybody! for the new year, Gambatte ne!!!!! Gambaru gambaru!!!